Top 5 Smoke Shows in the NASCAR Garage
Updated: Feb 18, 2021
Ahhh NASCAR, a man's world. Race fuel throwing beautiful fumes of life at your nostrils, mixed with the smell of rubber burning on pavement, washed down with your favorite beverage coming from, what seems to be, a bottomless well of greatness. When I was growing up, even though I was a child who could not drink yet, these are the things that I loved about this sport. Throughout the 90's and early 2000's, my family traveled to tracks up and down the East Coast, just to get our fix of some good ol' fashioned racing.
Now, with all of that being said, I can remember times where my Dad and I would catch each other, "noticing" a good looking female. That was usually followed up by a grin, and a head nod that we thought was some sort of secret code for "Oh hell yeah". However, lets face it, compared to other sporting events, this was pretty rare in the stands, or infield during the weekend of a NASCAR event. You were lucky to see a girl that had all of her teeth, or who's belly button wasn't hanging out while being pressed against the catch fence (we call them waffle bellies).
Insert one Shawna Robinson. For us 90's kids (I was born in '87) she set the standard for hotness in the NASCAR garage. There may not have been much competition, but Shawna was sexy. She could take that helmet off and let that blonde hair flow, she had all the boys staring.
In today's NASCAR, compared to the 90's and 2000's, us men are blessed. We have some ABSOLUTE smoke shows in the garage, and my Lord, its a beautiful thing. SO, I put together MY list of the top 5 smoke shows in NASCAR, and explained how I put the rankings together.
Criteria: Contestants must be 18 years of age or older. You must be a female, hot, and drive, or have driven a car in one of NASCAR's top four sanctioned series (ARCA, Trucks, Xfinity, Cup). Also, I figured driving talent and ability into their rankings. Now wait, before you say something along the lines of, "I'd like to see you drive a racecar", or "They could out drive you any day of the week", you might be right, but with all do respect (when I say this, I am automatically allowed to say anything I want afterward and you LEGALLY can't be offended), shut the fuck up. I'm writing the blog and you aren't. Also, I have won lots of iRacing races, as well as "real life" Front Wheel Drive 4-cylinder races on dirt. SO THERE!
For dramatics, we will go backwards down the list (Scrolling will lead to spoilers).
Honorable Mention- Jennifer Jo Cobb
The infamous Jennifer Jo. Too bad she is mostly famous for not being very good at driving race cars. Once in awhile, she looks good though. Now, she is getting a little long in the tooth (47 years old), but I did have a few beers with her in the camping lot at Eldora a few years ago and she seemed like a pretty cool chick. Back to the driving, she had a few top tens in the ARCA series at the beginning of her career, however since then, she has been awful in the truck series.
#5- Hannah Newhouse
Coming in at number five is everyone's favorite MRN pit reporter, Hannah Newhouse. Now Hannah barely makes the list because of her handful of ARCA series starts, but she has become a staple on the microphone for MRN. She has that "girl next door" look about her, which I absolutely love, unfortunately, she couldn't drive a wheel barrow at a construction site. This 24 year old does have one top ten on her NASCAR stat sheet, however, I'm sure it was a fluke.
#4- Natalie Decker
Yikes. Speaking of someone who couldn't drive a nail through a block of Styrofoam, 23 year old Natalie Decker is a nightmare on the race track. SOMEHOW (her good looks), she has maintained a ride in the NASCAR Truck series and now has appeared to sign at least a part-time gig in the Xfinity series. Natalie also has a bit of the "girl next door" look and personality, however, she pulls in ahead of Hannah on my list because I think she has a bit of a dark side, a "bad-girl" if you will.
#3- Brittney Zamora
Coming in at a respectable number three is newcomer, Brittney Zamora. I do not know much about Brittney, but she's cute, and she has to be a better driver than Natalie Decker right? This 21 year old is new to the ARCA series and she finished dead last at Daytona this past weekend. However, I haven't seen her wreck yet, so on looks alone, she slides in at a respectable number three on the smoke show list.
#2 Gracie Trotter
20 year old Gracie Trotter comes in at number two on my list. She's pretty cute in her own right, and I think she can actually drive (which is hot). Gracie is known as the first female to win an ARCA sanctioned race, and she also stole (imagine that cat fight, preferably in a mud pit) Brittney Zamora's ride because well, she's just better. Gracie finished 23rd in the ARCA Daytona race while also qualifying on the front row.
#1- Hailee Degan
'Hello there, angel of my nightmare...' What a fucking smoke show Hailee is. She comes off as a fun loving, dirt bike riding, tough truck racing, adrenaline junky. Did I mention she's an absolute fox??? Add in the fact that she has proven (so far) that she can in fact wheel anything they put in front of her and you can see why 19 year old Deegan comes in at the top of the list. She has won a couple of K&N series races and she seems to be most comfortable on the dirt, which really pulls at my heart strings. Hailee has the potential to make a very quick climb to the top of the NASCAR series ranks, and yes, she will be much better than Danican't drive a big wheel Patrick. If i had any advice for this up-and-coming hottie, take it easy on that R-word, even if the other drivers are driving a little fire retardant.
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